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Sat, Nov. 5th, 2011, 01:36 pm
Apparently, Finnish Wheel of Fortune is So Bad It's Good

My friend showed me this, and I thought it was lolarious, and it's kinda relevant 'cause I'm learning Finnish now:

Mikä tämä on? Onko tämä vitsi? Missä helvetissä Xulu on? Röömi?? Onko "K" vokaali siellä? Is this dumb chick a meme in Finland? (Crikey, I just started learning suomi and I'm still doing better than this. -_- I hope... hell, most of what they're saying in this video is still over my head, but this chick is so muy estúpido that I'm able to catch onto the fail all the same.)

Even though actually explaining it in English is totally unfunny, this ditz (among other things):

  • Tried to solve "Toppilan satama sijaitsee Oulussa" (meaning roughly "Topilla harbor is in Oulu") as "Toppilan Satama Sijaitsee Xulussa" ("Topilla harbor is in Xulu") ...lolwut. X isn't even a productive letter in Finnish. It shows up less than it does in English.
  • Tried to buy the "vowel" k. 'nuff said. That's just as fail in Finnish as it is in English.
  • Tried to solve "Polkka on lähtöisin Böömista" ("Polka is from Bohemia") as "Polkka on lähtöisin Röömista" ("Polka is from Röömi"). Just as bizarre as Xulu, but for some reason I think Xulu sounds infinitely funnier, especially its inflected inessive form Xulussa. It almost sounds perverted, like "stick it in my xulussa, bebe~♥". I wonder which would be a better place to live: "Xulu" or "Röömi"?

I'd actually watch game shows if all the contestants were this terminally dimwitted.

(Also, that "syvähierontalaite" thing is just... wut.)

Fri, Oct. 28th, 2011, 04:45 pm

I bought the stuff to make rice-krispy treats, but the cereal and marshmallows don't have the recipe on them, so I had to actually get it off of the Internet. What is this world coming to?

Thu, Oct. 27th, 2011, 07:47 pm

I really want to take a shot at seriously learning a Uralic language like Hungarian, Finnish, or Estonian, but then I realize “18 noun cases,” and I get really really discouraged. :(

Fri, Oct. 14th, 2011, 06:57 am
OMG HITLER WAS AN OXYGEN-BREATHING, CARBON-BASED LIFEFORM!!1

Glenn Beck, being ever the classy and level-headed moderate that he is, has a penchant for comparing everything left of far-right to Hitler and the Nazis, so now he has compared the Occupy Wall Street protesters to Hitler (oh and damn it, Glenn, I thought you finally went away when you got too crazy for even FOX News to air your wharrgarbl):

OH NO someone has twenty-three items in the express lane THEY’RE LIKE HITLER someone stole my parking spot IT’S LIKE NAZI GERMANY i broke a nail this morning IT’S LIKE THE HOLOCAUST it’s hot in here and nobody will turn on the air conditioner AUSCHWITZ DIDN’T HAVE AIR CONDITIONERS EITHER people on the internet disagree with me OH GOD THE THIRD REICH IS BACK the vending machine is out of doritos WHAT NEXT, GAS CHAMBERS

I am so fucking sick of hearing people compare everything to Hitler and the Nazis. I don’t care who says it—it doesn’t matter if they’re liberal or if they’re conservative, but lately conservatives have been the ones I’ve heard throwing around the Godwins like crazy because of Occupy Wall Street. However, if the Occupy Wall Street protesters really are a bunch of disorganized “hippies” full of unfocused rage as the right tends to portray them, then they can’t be like Hitler or the Nazis, because that would mean, if nothing else, that they’re too ineffectual to organize and focus themselves, much less an entire nation or army. Fuck, I think the Tea Party as a whole is profoundly ignorant, drunk on white privilege, and just plain ridic as all get out, but not once have I ever compared them to Hitler or Nazis or accused them of being the American Third Reich. (Unfortunately, though, other people on the left did, so my cynicism tells me there are probably at least a few Occupy Wall Street sympathizers doing the same thing, though I have yet to see it personally.)

But this rant isn’t about politics; it’s about people comparing everything to Nazis and Hitler, so say it with me now, everyone:

The only thing “like” Hitler is Hitler.
The only thing “like” the Nazis are the Nazis.
The only thing “like” The Holocaust is The Holocaust.

I am sure real Holocaust survivors would agree.

Fuck, learn some respect, people.

And, no, Stalin, Mussolini, Pol Pot, et al. are not acceptable for your comparisons, either. Don’t even think about it.

Sat, Sep. 10th, 2011, 11:39 am
Now for a brilliant piece of advice from my friend:

CaF: Remember - Drink 'till she's cute, but stop before the wedding plans

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